Revenge Can Be Very Sweet
by oh yeah
Summary: Galadriel, Arwen, and Caladrim (Lego's wife) are having marriage problems. Lord Elrond helps them out...
1. A Meeting of a Different Kind

_Disclaimer: I own nothing you recognize.  I got the plot idea from The First Wives Club by Olivia Goldman.  Anything from the lovely world of Lord of the Rings belongs to Tolkien.  _

_Notes: You might want to read my other fic The Perfect Match, to find out more about Legolas and Lady Caladrim.  Don't be afraid to review!  This is AU.  There was no ring.  Eowyn's uncle is still King of Rohan and she is visiting Gondor for a little while.  Arwen is still married to Aragorn.  _

_Summary: Lady Galadriel, Arwen, and Lady Caladrim (Legolas's wife) are fed up with their husbands.  Lord Celeborn played with Galadriel's mirror, putting his feet in it and giggling.  King Aragorn seems to have given up on Arwen now that she isn't an elf and seems to be in Eowyn's company more often than not.  Prince Legolas is constantly traveling for his own kingdom and when Lady Caladrim (his wife) tried to help, he wouldn't let her!  _

                                                Revenge Can Be Very Sweet

                                                                 Chapter 1

                                               A Meeting of a Different Kind

            It was a warm, sunny afternoon in Rivendell when the meeting was held.  It consisted of Lady Galdriel, Arwen, and Lady Caladrim- Legolas's wife.  None of the husbands were present.  

            'Remind me again why have to meet in Rivendell?' Arwen whined.  

            'Hush child," Lady Galadriel commanded.  "You will all have your explanations later."

            "But I want to know now!" exclaimed Arwen.  

            Lady Galadriel sighed and stood.  She started to pace.  Slow at first, then faster and faster until,……… she stopped and faced Arwen and Caladrim.  

            "Both of you have written to me about problems in your married life, have you not?" Both Arwen and Caladrim sighed and nodded their heads yes.  

            "You wanted answers, and thought I could give them to you.  But my children, I am afraid I cannot.  I feel that I am not qualified because I have my own problems with my married life."  Arwen and Caladrim gasped audibly.  How could the lovely Lady Galadriel have problems with her married life?

             "So I feel, in order to get the answers we all seek, that we should ask someone who is the wisest person I know, Lord Elrond." Galadriel finished.  

              "But he's male!" Caladrim stated, as if Galadriel did not know this.  Galadriel looked bored.  

             "I know he's male.  But he hasn't had any problems with his married life, has he?" Arwen and Caladrim were silent.  Galadriel smirked.  

             "You see, sometimes I do know what I'm talking about."  Caladrim opened her mouth to reply to that statement when in walked Lord Elrond himself, the topic of their recent discussion.  

             "Good morning ladies." He said cheerfully.  Caladrim gave a glum "good morning yourself" and Arwen didn't reply at all.  Only Lady Galadriel said, with a hint of cheerfulness, "Ah, just who we wanted to see."  

             Lord Elrond smiled and nodded, and sat down in a chair facing the three women.  "What can I do for you three fine lades today?" he started.  

            "Well," began Lady Caladrim, "did you ever have any problems with your marriage?"  She looked up shyly at him.  

            Lord Elrond looked amused and said "Not any serious problems really.  Why do you ask?"

            Arwen began to pour out her whole story.  

            "It's Aragorn, Ada.  I think he's upset because I'm not an elf anymore."  Lord Elrond raised his eyebrows at this but said nothing.  Arwen took this as a sign to continue on.  

            "You see, right after we got married, he got,… stranger.  And then, when I told him I was pregnant with our first child, he freaked.  Even after our child was born, he still wasn't acting the same way.  Eventually, he moved to a different bedroom!  I think that he loves Eowyn!  I don't know what to do!  It's like he doesn't love me anymore."  Arwen finished and the silence afterwards was deafening.  Her shoulders sagged visibly.  

            Lord Elrond cleared his throat several times before Lady Caladrim caught on.  It was her turn now.  

            "As you know, I'm married to Legolas.  Well, he has taken up a kind of campaigning for Mirkwood.  He rides around to different countries, making alliances, blah, blah, blah.  He started not spending enough time with me so I decided to go along with him.  That first time, we had a lot of fun.  Traveling to Rohan and back, even though I hate traveling, was made bearable because he was there.  

            "Well, when we got back to Mirkwood, it was soon time to set out again.  I made ready but, as I was packing, Legolas came in and told me I wasn't going!  When I asked him why, he said that I slowed everything up!  When I still continued to pack, he forbid me to go!  HE FORBID ME!?!?!? The nerve of that man!  All this happened a week ago."  Finished Caladrim.  

            Lord Elrond took a deep breath.  He was already regretting ever saying that he would help the three women.  It was finally Lady Galadriel's turn.  

            "My husband Lord Celeborn and I have been married for years and years.  We had certain boundaries set for each other.  For example, he did not touch my things- my MIRROR- and I did not touch his things.

             "It worked well until one day, I decided that I needed to consult my mirror again.  As I neared the glade where I keep it and I heard… splashing sounds and a few giggles.  I walked in slowly and what do I find?  My husband, the Lord of Lothlorien, splashing and giggling and putting his feet in my mirror!  

            "I asked myself, is this what I want for a husband?  Right before I alerted him to my presence, he muttered 'I hope Galadriel sticks her face in this.  I mean, it would be funny because my feet were there.'  I was so mad, that I summoned this meeting immediately and rode here as fast as I could.  Can you help us?"

            The three women looked forlornly down into their laps and Lady Caladrim did puppy dog eyes.  What chance did a male elf stand against the most beautiful beings in the elven race?  

            "I will help you."  Lord Elrond sighed dejectedly.  He did not want to do this.  Lord Elrond knew that if the women's husbands ever found out what he was planning to do, he would be buried alive.  

            "What do we do?" Arwen asked excitedly.  

            "I think," Lord Elrond said slowly, "that you need a little………revenge."

            The women squealed in anticipation as Lord Elrond told them of his plan.  


	2. The Men

**_Disclaimer_**_: Refer to chapter 1.  The woman who wrote The First Wives Club was Olivia Goldsmith.  Sorry.  _

**_Notes:_**_ OMG!  I didn't think anyone would read my story!  Thank you all so much!  You make writing so much more enjoyable!  *kisses* _

**Silivros**- You are really too kind.  *mutters and looks embarrassed* 

**_happy molecul_**_e- Thank you for reviewing! *huggies*_

_Does anyone know how to get bold and italics to show up on ff.net?  _

**_Summary:_**_ Lady Galadriel, Arwen, and Lady Caladrim (Legolas's wife) are fed up with their husbands.  Lord Celeborn played with Galadriel's mirror, putting his feet in it and giggling.  King Aragorn seems to have given up on Arwen now that she isn't an elf and seems to be in Eowyn's company more often than not.  Prince Legolas is constantly traveling for his own kingdom and when Lady Caladrim (his wife) tried to help, he wouldn't let her!  _

                                               Revenge Can Be Very Sweet

                                                               Chapter 2

                                                                The Men

                                                            King Aragorn

            King Aragorn sighed as he sat on his throne.  Where was his wife?  She should be here with him, yet she wasn't.  Where was she?  

            Eowyn strolled into the room right as Aragorn was having these thoughts.  She smiled coyly at him.  King Aragorn forced a smile at her.  Her Uncle was, after all, the King of Rohan.  

            For the past few weeks that Eowyn had been in Gondor, she seemed to always be near him.  It rather drove him crazy.  Eowyn knew he was married and that he would never do anything to hurt his wife.  He loved her.  He just wasn't sure if she loved him.  

            Lately, it seemed that Eowyn was especially close whenever Arwen was close by.  If Arwen noticed this than she didn't give any sort of sign.  Aragorn wished she would.  

            If only to save him from Eowyn.  

            Where is Arwen?  Why wasn't she near him?  What could she possibly be doing?  

            During his musings, a guard came towards him and handed Aragorn a message.  The message read:

                                    Aragorn,

                                                I'm going to Rivendell to visit a few friends.  I'll be back 

soon.  

                                    Goddbye,

                                                Arwen

            There wasn't a single 'love' or 'darling' on the whole letter.  It was completely devoid of any emotion.  Even her handwriting didn't tell him anything.  

            'Oh well,' Aragorn thought, 'I'll be fine without her.'

            Won't I?

                                                             Legolas

            Ahh.  Mirkwood's borders are in sight.  Soon, he would be with his wife.  

            What if she was still mad about that fact that he had refused to let her come?  He had only done it for her own good.  Caladrim didn't enjoy traveling.  At all.  

            Legolas could see it on her face when she went with him that one time.  The whole thing had been torture for her.  Maybe if he spent a little more time at home with her…

            No.  Who else would be able to make treaties for Mirkwood?  Or bargains?  Or food exchanges?  His father?  The idea was almost as laughable as dwarves doing the can-can.  

            King Thranduil would rather stay at home than do the right thing for his country.  It was up to Legolas to keep everything running smoothly.  The whole country ran because of him.  

            King Thranduil could not do it.  Legolas just hoped that Caladrim knew this.  

            Otherwise, Legolas would be in big trouble.  

            Oh no.  He was in big trouble.  

                                                      Lord Celeborn

            He he he.  It worked.  Galadriel was gone.  Hopefully not for good though.  Just long enough so that he and the other elves of Lothlorien could plan her birthday party.  Galadriel didn't normally have birthday parties so he knew this was going to be a big surprise.  Hopefully, she wouldn't be mad at him anymore by then.  

            When she found him sticking his feet in the fountain, the look on her face would have been funny if it wasn't directed at him.  

            The result was that he was scared out of his wits. 

            But that didn't last long.  She simply glared and then turned and walked away as fast as she could without looking like she was in a hurry to passing elves.  

            She seemed very mad though.  Maybe sticking his feet in the mirror wasn't such a good idea.  Maybe it would have been better if he had spilled something on her favorite dress or something.  

            Yeah.  That would have been a way better idea.  Only a stupid, idiot elf would mess with her mirror.  

            Uh oh.  

            You stupid, idiot elf.  


	3. The Plan is in Action

_Disclaimer: Refer to chapter 1._

_Notes: You might want to read my other fic The Perfect Match, to find out more about Legolas and Lady Caladrim.  Don't be afraid to review!  This is AU.  There was no ring.  Eowyn's uncle is still King of Rohan and she is visiting Gondor for a little while.  Arwen is still married to Aragorn.  _

_Summary: Lady Galadriel, Arwen, and Lady Caladrim (Legolas's wife) are fed up with their husbands.  Lord Celeborn played with Galadriel's mirror, putting his feet in it and giggling.  King Aragorn seems to have given up on Arwen now that she isn't an elf and seems to be in Eowyn's company more often than not.  Prince Legolas is constantly traveling for his own kingdom and when Lady Caladrim (his wife) tried to help, he wouldn't let her!  _

HOW DO YOU GET ITALICS AND BOLD ON FF.NET?

Revenge Can Be Very Sweet

Chapter 3

The Plan is in Action

"Ladies, this is my idea."  All three women leaned forward eagerly in order to hear better.  They were all so close, in fact, that Elrond had to push his chair backwards so that he wasn't overpowered by the smell of their perfume.  

"I think that jealousy is a key factor in it.  We all know that your husbands love you-" a few looks were traded between the women, "maybe they just have problems showing it to you."  A few more looks were given but all three stayed silent.  

"Prove it." Arwen stated, looking less than thrilled at how "the plan" was progressing.  Lord Elrond looked slightly irritated.  

"Now," he continued, oblivious- or choosing to overlook- Arwen's earlier statement, "what you need to do is to make them jealous.  So insanely jealous, that no other possible thought enters their mind but to make you theirs again." Lord Elrond finished his statement.  

"But, how?" Caladrim had the nerve to ask.  

"How else?  Flirt with someone else.  Lady Galadriel," he said, addressing her for the first time, "you should completely ignore your husband.  If he asks you a question, refuse to answer it.  Simply look away.  If someone else asks you the same question, answer it.  Be as friendly as you'd like."  Elrond took a deep breath.  

"Daughter," he continued, talking to Arwen, "your husband is often seen with Eowyn, right?"  Arwen nodded and Lord Elrond continued.  "The Steward of Gondor is in love with Eowyn."

"Faramir?" Arwen gasped.  She had spent a lot of her time in the White City trying to find out who had captured the young Steward's heart.  

"I think," said Elrond, "that being seen with Faramir with accomplish two things at once."  Upon seeing Arwen's blank look, he said, "You will get Aragorn and Faramir will get Eowyn."  

"Lady Caladrim, your husband, as you told us, travels around a lot.  Why don't **you** travel around a lot, just to let him see what it feels like.  And," he continued, "if that doesn't work, maybe you should be seen with Glorfindel often.  Nothing like loneliness to fuel the fire of jealousy."  

As Elrond finished, the women gathered in a circle, blocking him out.  

"You were right!" Arwen exclaimed.  "Ada was a perfect choice to go to for advice!"  Galadriel allowed herself a rather unladylike smirk to play upon her lips.  Princess Caladrim frowned.  

"What's wrong?" Galadriel asked, concerned.  

"I don't want to be seen with Glorfindel.  When Legolas is jealous………it's scary."  

"You're not telling me that you're scared of your husband are you?"  Arwen exclaimed, shocked.  She had heard of Legolas's temper, but had never seen it herself.  

"One day, when he was courting me, an elf of Rivendell came to Mirkwood.  I was there, of course, and this elf and I, had once been………close.  Not anymore, of course, but he seemed to think so.  Well, one day I was by myself in a garden, Legolas was coming to meet me there, and this elf tried to kiss me.  Legolas came in at that point and, well, ………that elf went home to Mirkwood that very day."

Arwen clasped a hand over her mouth in shock.  "He's worse than I thought." she said, in awe of Legolas's temper.  

"Well, that side of him isn't seen very often, but when it is………" Caladrim sighed to herself.  

"So, is Elrond's plan good?" Galadriel questioned.  

Caladrim reluctantly said yes and Arwen jumped for joy.  

"Plan Jealousy is in motion ladies………" Arwen grinned.  


	4. Arwen Visits Aragorn

_Disclaimer: Refer to chapter 1._

_Notes: You might want to read my other fic The Perfect Match, to find out more about Legolas and Lady Caladrim.  Don't be afraid to review!  This is AU.  There was no ring.  Eowyn's uncle is still King of Rohan and she is visiting Gondor for a little while.  Arwen is still married to Aragorn.  _

_Summary: Lady Galadriel, Arwen, and Lady Caladrim (Legolas's wife) are fed up with their husbands.  Lord Celeborn played with Galadriel's mirror, putting his feet in it and giggling.  King Aragorn seems to have given up on Arwen now that she isn't an elf and seems to be in Eowyn's company more often than not.  Prince Legolas is constantly traveling for his own kingdom and when Lady Caladrim (his wife) tried to help, he wouldn't let her!  _

HOW DO YOU GET BOLD AND ITALICS ON FF.NET?

Revenge Can Be Very Sweet

Chapter 4

Arwen Visits Aragorn

At the meeting with Lady Galadriel and Princess Caladrim, it was decided that Arwen would go first.  If Arwen's mission was a success, then Caladrim would go.  If not, ………Elrond would pay.  Dearly.  

That is what Arwen was thinking as she approached Minas Tirith, the city where Aragorn, her, sometimes, beloved husband was.  

Aragorn didn't even come out to greet his wife even though she had been absent for several days.  What could he possible be doing that was more important than greeting his wife after a long absence?  What would his people think of him?

Arwen had made sure that she had been seen as she had entered the city.  Who could miss their Queen as she returned home?  

The townspeople had cheered and waved, some even threw flowers in her direction.  All this meant nothing because her husband wasn't there to bask in the people's love with her.  

What had she become?  Arwen thought, disgusted with herself.  Where had the old Arwen gone, the Arwen of yesterday?  

Well, that Arwen could be strong and cunning and smooth, so can I.  

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Faramir watched Eowyn out of the corner of his eye.  So beautiful.  

But she constantly ignored him.  The only person she had eyes for Aragorn.  

That stupid King.  He gets all the girls.  

Faramir was so caught up in his observation of Aragorn and Eowyn that he didn't notice the whenever Eowyn looked away, Aragorn's face lost its mask of happiness and looked downright………disgusted.  

Love makes people blind sometimes.   

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Arwen took a deep, steadying breath.  Calm, have………got………to……….be………calm.  

It was her mantra.  She repeated it over and over and over again to herself as she approached the castle where her husband was.  

Right as the guards opened the gates, she saw Faramir.  Faramir was standing rather close to her husband, but, instead of going to her husband first, Arwen went towards Faramir and whispered in his ear "We need to talk.  Meet in the west garden."  And she glided away.  

Now it was Aragorn's turn to glare at Faramir.  How dare he talk to his wife like that?  

Of course, Faramir said nothing to Arwen but Aragorn conveniently skipped over that fact.  

Arwen glided over to Aragorn and he lifted his face for a kiss from his wife.  Arwen took one look at him and turned and left.  Aragorn was still standing, staring after his unaffectionate wife, wondering where their marriage went wrong.  


	5. Faramir and Realizations

_Disclaimer: I own nothing you recognize.  I got the plot idea from The First Wives Club by Olivia Goldman.  Anything from the lovely world of Lord of the Rings belongs to Tolkien.  _

_Notes: You might want to read my other fic The Perfect Match, to find out more about Legolas and Lady Caladrim.  Don't be afraid to review!  This is AU.  There was no ring.  Eowyn's uncle is still King of Rohan and she is visiting Gondor for a little while.  Arwen is still married to Aragorn.  _

_Summary: Lady Galadriel, Arwen, and Lady Caladrim (Legolas's wife) are fed up with their husbands.  Lord Celeborn played with Galadriel's mirror, putting his feet in it and giggling.  King Aragorn seems to have given up on Arwen now that she isn't an elf and seems to be in Eowyn's company more often than not.  Prince Legolas is constantly traveling for his own kingdom and when Lady Caladrim (his wife) tried to help, he wouldn't let her!  _

                                                Revenge Can Be Very Sweet

Chapter 5

Faramir and Realizations

Arwen marched proudly out of the room after seeing Aragorn again for the first time since her return.  She quickly ran- not when anyone was looking of course- to her room and changed out of her traveling clothes and into a simple dress.  Not to simple of course- it had to befit a Queen.  

After that she ran out to the gardens to meet Faramir.  

She arrived rather quickly and sat on a bench to wait for him.  Soon, she spotted Faramir looking for her and waved him over to her.  

"Sit down" she commanded and Faramir sat.  Quickly.  Arwen seemed, tense.  To say the least.  She kepted looking around and if she saw anyone else she would quickly act like she didn't see them.  

Faramir couldn't help but wonder…

"Faramir," Arwen said, to get his attention, "do you know why I wanted to talk to you?"  Faramir shook his head and Arwen sighed.  

"Well, as you may know, Aragorn and I have been having some…problems that need to be worked out."  Faramir nodded.  Any fool could see that Arwen was unhappy with Aragorn.  

"Now, Aragorn seems reluctant to work them out with me," she frowned, "or really have anything to do with me… but that's all for another day.  Anyway," she leaned closer to him and looked him square in the eye, "I need you to help me win him back."  She finished her statement and sighed contentedly, watching his reaction very closely.  

Faramir wondered if she was crazy.  

He really did.  Any fool could see that Aragorn was in love with Arwen, he just didn't know how to show it.  That seemed to be the problem with all men.  Faramir added himself into that category.  He loved Eowyn with all his heart but he could barely get up the nerve to talk to her.  And when he did, it seemed his childhood stutter would come back to haunt him.  

After that one time, he could never get up the nerve to talk to her again…

~Flashback~

The courtyard was deserted as the bell tower had just struck noon.  Everyone was inside eating except him and his dream, Eowyn of Rohan.  

She stood tall and strong next to a bench.  Faramir was holding a small bouquet of flowers and his knees were slightly shaking.  Time to make his move…

" E-e-Eowyn," he began.  Curse it all.  His stutter had returned full force.  She turned slightly so she could see him.  

"Hello Faramir."  She smiled and Faramir's heart fluttered in his chest.  

"I-I wanted y-y-you to ha-ave thi-s."  He thrust that bouquet into her hands and fled quickly, before she could see the redness in his cheeks and tears in his eyes.  

To Faramir's utmost embarrassment, Eowyn **did** see.  The next day, when no one was watching, she slipped a note of thanks under his door.  It said:

Dear Faramir,

            Thank you so much for the thought.  The flowers are beautiful.  I love them.  

                        Eowyn

            p.s. A stutter is nothing to be ashamed of.  

~End of Flashback~

Faramir had not been able to look her in the eye since that day.  She had **known**!  Almost no one else knew.  His stutter only returned when he got excited and, it seemed, when **she** was around.  

Arwen seemed to be able to tell that Faramir thought she was insane because she said to entice him to join her game, "It would help you win Eowyn over…"

Faramir cursed under his breath.  Arwen seemed to know what his heart most desired.  She knew exactly what to say.  Curse the elves and their manipulating ways!

'What do you want me to do?" Faramir sighed.  Arwen broke into a grin and leapt off the bench in jubilation.  

"I'm going to make him sooo jealous…" she trailed off and stared over Faramir's shoulder.  There were Aragorna and Eowyn, walking in the garden…together.  Arwen's eyes narrowed and Faramir felt as if he couldn't breathe.  If that was how they wanted to play…

Faramir grabbed Arwen and pressed his mouth over hers.  Well, he didn't make the rules, might as well break 'em.  


	6. All Things End Well

_Disclaimer: I own nothing you recognize.  I got the plot idea from The First Wives Club by Olivia Goldman.  Anything from the lovely world of Lord of the Rings belongs to Tolkien.  _

_A/N: I WON'T UPDATE UNTIL I GET ATLEAST **FIVE **MORE REVIEWS!  PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, REVIEW!  IF YOU HAVE AN OUNCE OF HUMANITY IN YOU, YOU **WILL** REVIEW!  A REVIEW STARVED AUTHORESS IS AN EVIL, EVIL THING *INSANE LAUGHTER IN BACKGROUND*_

                                                Revenge Can Be Very Sweet

Chapter 6

All Things End Well

Aragorn had been having a good day, considering.  Considering that Faramir, **his chief advisor**, kept glaring at him, Eowyn kept **winking** at him, his wife comes home after a long weary journey and shows no affection to him what so ever, and, to top it all off, he sees his chief advisor and his wife **kissing**, or, as his son liked to say, K.I.S.S.I.N.G., in the garden.  

This means war.  

No, seriously.  All out war.  Starting now.  

And with that, Aragorn marched over to his wife, Arwen, and his chief Advisor, Faramir, and pushed them apart.  Then Aragorn landed a right hook on Faramir and down he went.  

Or, at least, that's what he planned to do.  

But first, Eowyn gripped his arm tightly and whipped him around to face her.  

Just as suddenly, she leaned in a planted her lips on his.  

Aragorn was suddenly wide-awake.  His eyes remained open to see Arwen push Faramir away, come storming over to Aragorn, followed closely by Faramir, and push Eowyn away from him.  

Eowyn would have done a face plant in the mud, but, just in time, Faramir caught her and they **both **landed in the mud, one on top of the other.  

But, before Aragorn could see anything else, a dainty hand came into his vision and slapped him.  Absentmindedly, Arargorn put a hand up to his face to feel it.  His cheek stung.  But the words that were said next, made Aragorn forget about his cheek.  

"That hurt me more than it hurt you" Arwen whispered in his ear.  

Of course, when she said that, Arwen forgot that Aragorn did not have elven hearing.  She sighed in irritation.  Aragorn couldn't even hear that.  

Before she could repeat herself, Aragorn frowned and said "What?"

Arwen sighed again and said, a little louder this time, "That hurt me more than it hurt you."  Aragorn looked at her.  

"I doubt that." he said, but with a smile on his face.  Arwen broke into a smile and she knew that everything would be alright for them in the end.  

But would it work out for Faramir?

~Faramir's pov~

I was racing beside Arwen when I saw her push Eowyn away.  

That was it.  I decided that Arwen was a cruel and heartless elf.  After all, she pushed **my** baby.  

Did I just do that?  Did I just call Eowyn my baby?  

Oh no.

This was it.  

I was in love.  

But how did she feel?  Did she love me back?  Did she feel the same way about me that I did her?  I saw stars every time I looked into her eyes.  Which, okay, wasn't all that often but still.  Even though Arwen was the Evenstar, when I kissed her, I felt nothing.  No emotions stirred in my heart.  All I could think about was Eowyn.  

When I kissed Eowyn, would it feel this way?  

When?  What do I mean, when?  It could only be if.  If I kissed Eowyn…

I quickly put my mind back to the task at hand, which was to stop Eowyn from falling in the mud.  

I raced forward as if on cue, and caught her.  

Oh, curse it all.  

I was not on balance.  I was falling, falling…

I knew, though, that if I died like this, I would be happy because I had Eowyn in my arms.  

We landed with a splash, literally.  She on top of me.  I took deep, steadying breaths.  I would not ruin it all now.  

Calm.  

I will be calm.  

Despite the fact that I've got the girl of my dreams lying on top of me, not seeming to want to get off.  

It would really help if I was calm now.  

Then, she smiled at me.  I blushed and my heart sped up.  Eowyn giggled.  Oh, how I loved her giggle.  Even though this was the only time I'd heard it.  It was beautiful.  Just like her.  

~Eowyn's pov~

He didn't seem to want to let go of me.  

Seriously.  

His hands stayed on my waist and kept me pinned to him.  I could hear his heart's steady beat.  

Not that I minded being close to him.  

Why else would I flirt with Aragorn?  No offense Arwen, really, but Aragorn is **boring**.  He doesn't do anything.  Plus, he talks too much.  Doesn't he know the true value of silence?  

But Faramir did…

I had been trying so hard ever since that day he gave me flowers to get him to talk to me.  Or at least make eye contact.  

Nothing.  

No results.  I swear, he's the only man I know who is completely immune to my charms and witty repartee.

Ha ha ha.  

I had never met anyone else who had a stutter like mine.  Of course, I got rid of mine a long time ago, but still.  People in Middle Earth didn't normally get stutters.  

I smiled at him.  Maybe he needed a little helpful incentive to get him to make a move on me.  

Hmm…

What could I do?  Well, I was lying on top of him.  

So, I leaned down and kissed him.  Definitely a better kiss then Aragorn's.  


	7. Epilogue for Gondor and Back to Elrond

_Disclaimer: If I owned LoTR, do you think I would be writing fanfiction?_

_To everyone who reviewed, thank you sooo much!  Despite my somewhat acute case of writer's block, I was able to churn this out for you.  I know, I know, it's not very long.  But, I promise, from now on, all my chapters will have at least six pages before I post them on ff.net.   Okay with everyone? _

_I replaced the text of existing chapters with a new text.  It's not any different, it just has bold and italics.  You do not have to read it over again to understand anything.  _

_Happy Molecule- thank you thank you thank you!  *kisses* I included Elrond again, just for you!_

_Five reviews- or else NO LEGOLAS!_

_This is, kinda, two chapters in one.  I hope that makes some kind of sense.  _

                                                Revenge Can Be Very Sweet

Chapter 7

Epilogue for Gondor and Back to Elrond

Epilogue for Gondor 

Soon after the…excitement in the garden, Faramir and Eowyn were married.  They had a small, private ceremony and only close friends and family were invited.  

Arwen and Aragorn were present.  

Eowyn helped Faramir get over his stutter and they became even closer because of their past speech impediments.  

Aragorn moved back into Arwen and his bedroom.  Their son was soon accompanied by several girl siblings.  

Arwen never told Aragorn how she visited her father and told him, Caladrim, and Galadriel about their marriage problems.  Well, she didn't tell him then anyway.  

Faramir remained Aragorn's chief advisor despite both Aragorn and Faramir having slight lingering resentments that the other kissed their wives.  

Eventually, all things were forgiven and the rulers and advisors of Gondor lived in peace until…

**_~Interlude~_**

Back to Elrond

"Well, well, well."  Galadriel smiled.  "Elrond, so good to see you again.  Not."  Elrond winced.  This could, and probably would, become slightly painful.  

"Well, I'm glad to see you."  Elrond said, trying to soften the blow.  

"Just kidding!  It worked, it really worked!" she squealed excitedly and hugged her son-in-law.  Elrond began to suffocate with the combined pressure of Galadriel and Caladrim squeezing the air out of him.  

"Ladies, as much as I love each of you, I would like to breathe soon" Elrond managed to choke out.  Galadriel and Caladrim each backed off of Elrond, and Caladrim had the decency to blush with embarrassment.  

"Sorry," she muttered and shuffled her feet a little bit.  "Before I go and continue the plan, I was wondering if we could work it out with a little more detail before I go.  I'm not good at making things up as I go."  Caladrim said this all really fast so that only elves could understand her.  

Elrond smiled and nidded his head.  There was nothing wrong with working the plan out a little more…

"So, you will go back to your home in Mirkwood, and wait for Legolas to arrive there" Elrond started.  "Then, when he gets there, you will not sleep with him." He had the decency to blush as he was saying this.  Afterall, it was kind of an embarrassing subject for everyone.  

"Not even in the same room?" Caladrim asked, surprised at the new turn of events.  

"Not even in the same room." Elrond nodded.  Caladrim gulped and looked at Galadriel.  Galadriel, in turn, just shrugged and had an expression on her face that read 'who knows? Maybe he's right.'  Elrond sighed.  No one had any confidence in his opinion anymore, even though he had come up with the plan himself.  He sighed again.  Women.  No matter how he tried to understand them, he couldn't.  At least it wasn't just him.  

But, he had to admit, even though he had had his own set of troubles- not that he told anyone of course- he had never had to come to anyone else for help with **his** marriage.  Well, that wasn't **exactly** true…

Oh well.  

Not that he would _tell _anyone that.  

"Back to the subject at hand ladies," Elrond continued, trying to get away from his thoughts.  Nowadays, since his wife had gone over the sea, any mention of her in conversation was painful.  Remembering happy times was even worse.  

"The next morning, Legolas should be very…upset." Elrond smiled.  He remembered when his wife had done the same thing to him.  Upset could not even describe it.  More like, towering rage against any male elf within sight.  

"You eat breakfast with him.  If he asks, don't say anything and change the subject really fast.  He ought to get even angrier.  That afternoon, be sure that you are seen with Glorfindel in public.  Also, make sure that you were supposed to meet Legolas at that time." Elrond chuckled.  He was getting his revenge from Legolas, Aragorn, and Celeborn and they might never know!  'That would show them for making sure a stripper was at my last birthday party.'  Elrond thought.  

He he he.  

Revenge can be sweet.  For everyone.  

He was even getting back Glorfindel.  Legolas does get very mad.  He's got the temper of his father.  Elrond let out another chuckle.  

Years ago, when Elrond had first met his wife, Glorfindel had made things very…complicated for them.  

Ah yes.  Revenge can be **very** sweet.  

"What's so funny my Lord?" Caladrim questioned, trying to find out what was so funny about her quickly dissolving marriage and their plan to recreate it.  

"Nothing that concerns you, my dear." Elrond said, still chuckling to himself.  Galadriel and Caladrim shared another look that clearly said 'men'.  

"Now, once you have done that, you leave Mirkwood."  

"Leave Mirkwood?  But that's my home!" Caladrim said, upset.  

"I know, honey, but you're going to travel around and cancel all the treaties that Legolas made with neighboring countries."

"Couldn't that start a war?" Caladrim questioned.  

"Possibly. But more probably, the neighboring countries will send messengers into Mirkwood to find out if Legolas really wants to cancel all the treaties.  Then he will know what you're doing.  He'll go out and hunt you down, and when he finds you, all you've got to do is tell him that you've missed him and you haven't been doing anything with Glorfindel, and he will be putty in your hands."  Elrond finished, excited.  He wanted to see how all this would turn out.  

"Aren't there a lot of things that could go wrong in that plan?" Caladrim questioned.  Elrond shrugged.  

Galadriel said "Oh, son't be a wussy."  Caladrim and Elrond turned to her, shocked.  Galadriel only shrugged.  

"Okay ladies, let's begin.  Caladrim, would you do the honors?"  

And that is how Caladrim found herself heading towards Mirkwood, her kingdom, and her husband, to show him what appreciating a woman **really** means.  


	8. Is Mirwood ready?

Disclaimer: If I owned Lord of the Rings or The First Wives Club, I don't think I'd be writing fan fiction, okay?

_Before I go ahead and post this chapter, I thought I'd better go ahead and thank my reviewers.  _

**Astronema**- he he he.  Your review cracked me up 

**_Alatriel_**_- you are so kind.  My family always said I was good, but, can you ever really believe your family?_

**_Stardust_**_- to answer your question, Glorfindel is in Mirkwood visiting the King.  I didn't really think about that when I decided to use him, bu the will be important later!_

**_Darma druid_**_- thank you so much!  I love your story!  _

**_Happy molecule-_**_ *kisses* to my most faithful reviewer!_

**_Fire eyes_**_- I seriously thank you!_

**_Tania nightqueen_**_- I'll try to put more chapters up for you!_

**_Celtic dawn star_**_- I haven't had a chance to review your story but I will soon!_

**_Long lost idiot_**_- I love your name!  I gat a lot giggles out of that one.  _

**_Silivros_**_- thanks to my first reviewer!_

**_Yeen_**_- this is just supposed to be light and funny, but I was thinking about writing a more serious one after I finish this.  Thanks for your review!  _

**_Arwen()-_**_ Aww, you're making me blush!  *hugs*  _

_A/N: I recently broke my toe, and though I can still type and write, I have trouble walking up stairs to my computer and I'm supposed to stay off it.  The nurse wrapped it so tight in the bandage thing that I lost all the feeling in my other toes.  *sigh* oh well.  I'll be able to walk in a few weeks.  _

Revenge Can Be Very Sweet

Chapter 8

Is Mirkwood Ready?

Legolas sighed as he entered the gates of Minias Tirith.  He was there to see Aragorn and Arwen.  

He remembered when they had been mad at each other.  Whenever it was spoken of, Arwen never mentioned how she knew the jealousy could make Aragorn prove his love.  

Before he hadn't really thought about it, but now…

With his own marriage on the skids, maybe Arwen could help him.  

Legolas gave his horse to the handler and left for the Great Hall, a place where he knew Arwen and Aragorn could be seen at this time of day.  

Sure enough, they were there and as soon as Legolas entered the hall, both Aragorn and Arwen jumped up to greet him.  

"It has been a while my friend" Aragorn said and clasped his hand.  "We have much to discuss."  But in reply, Legolas just shook his head and motioned to Arwen.  Aragorn shared a puzzled look with his wife but said nothing as Legolas grasped her arm lightly and propelled her out of the hall.  

"Arwen," Legolas said once they had safely made it out of everyone else's hearing range, "I need your help."  Arwen simply raised an eyebrow- the exact mimic of what her father did the day that saved her marriage- and said nothing.  

Legolas sighed.  "I recently returned home to Mirkwood." Legolas sent Arwen a look, but still she said nothing.  "I was looking for my wife.  She was not there."  Arwen still said nothing and Legolas felt his suspicions confirmed.  Something was amiss and Arwen knew what it was.  "Do you have any idea as to where she would be or what she could be doing?"  

Arwen shrugged her shoulders and said, her first words to him since they had met earlier, "Why would I know what you should know?  She is after all, _your_ wife, not mine."  

Legolas stormed out of Minias Tirith without having that talk with Aragorn.  

*Meanwhile*

"Where is my husband?"  Caladrim shouted, enraged.  She had been in Mirkwood for a week and she had seen neither hide nor hair of him.  No one knew where he went or where he could possibly be.  

Right now, she was talking to Glorfindel who knew just a little about the plan.  He just knew that he was visiting Mirkwood and that Princess Caladrim was showing him about and that he was supposed to make Legolas jealous.  So far, he had seen very little of the palace.  Or the grounds.  Or the woods.  Or any of the cities in Mirkwood.  And the Prince had been a no show.  

It was kind of a boring trip.  

Glrofindel was just about ready to go home but he felt that something, some feeling, was making him stay.  

It reminded him of when he visited Lady Galadriel and she talked to him inside his mind.  

Let's not go into what she said.  

It was something about making sure that a marriage worked???

He couldn't really remember anymore.  

Something was just willing him to stay and see what happened.  But Lady Galadriel couldn't have control over him when she was so far away could she?  

No.  Definitely not.  That would be impossible, wouldn't it?

Of course.  

Suddenly, Caladrim stopped complaining about her husband.  Glorfindel looked up.  She was listening hard and Glorfindel started to too.  

Very faintly he heard hoof beats.  

Caladrim started forward and whispered to him.  "My husband is returning home."

The hoof beats grew steadily louder and louder until they seemed just upon them and then Caladri jumped on Glorfindel's lap.  

He was so surprised he dropped her.  

It was rigt then he realized that he had just dropped the Princess of Mirkwood and quickly knelt bu=y her side and put an arm around her waist to help her up.  

But, she began…squealing?  No, giggling would be a more appropriate word.  It seemed the Princess of Mirkwood was a ticklish elf.  

Didn't meet many of those.  

*Legolas*

He had been riding hard and fast when he heard it.  His wife's giggling.  

But why was she giggling?

She never giggled unless if…someone was tickling her.  

No one tickled his wife except for him!  

They would pay.  

And with that, Legolas sent his horse into a gallop and arrived in the clearing where his wife was in record time.  

When he arrived, he saw his wife, on the ground, Glorfindel with his arms around her, tickling her.  

All Legolas could see was red.  It rimmed the corner of his eyes and blocked everything out but his wife and Glorfindel.  

Nothing else mattered but getting his wife away from Glrofindel.  

And, of course, revenge.  


	9. author's note

OMG!!! I am soooo sorry.  I'm having a serious case of writer's block, I don't have any time to write, and all this summer reading!!!  I hate summer reading.  It can die!  Sorry, anyway, the next chapter should be out by next week.  I've got abou half of it written, but I'm going on vacation soon and I won't be back until late July.  I'm hoping to have about two more chapters out by then.  Sorry!

oh yeah


	10. The Kiss

_Disclaimer: I own nothing.  No sue me.  _

Revenge Can Be Very Sweet

By: oh yeah

Chapter 9

The Kiss

~Glorfindel~

Caladrim was positively howling.  With laughter, of course, but still.  Howling.  Glorfindel tried to help her stand up and, eventually, it was accomplished.  Then, he looked up and who does he see?  Legolas.  Her husband.  Positively boiling with rage.  

Antoher oops.  

What is there to do?  Nothing.  How can Glorfindel escape Legolas's wrath?  I mean, no one can.  Why should he?  

But, Glorfindel isn't one to sit around and wait for things to happen on their own.  So he did the only thing he could do in a situation like this.  He grabbed Caladrim, jumped on their horse, and galloped away as fast as possible.  

~Caladrim~

Things never go as planned do they?  She and Lord Elrond had planned everything out perfectly, and this sort of thing never even entered their minds.  Glorfindel might try to escape Legolas.  

It was really, looking back on it, the only plausible thing to do.  What idiot would wait for Legolas to come and, putting it mildly, kill him?  

Is anyone stupid enough to do that?  

I don't think so.  

Maybe.  

But this, this madness?  

Caladrim struggled to move her arms.  She was, at present, tied to a tree in the middle of the forest.  By Glorfindel.  He kept _leering_ at her.  

Ewww.  

Gross.  

Glorfindel, leering?  Not a good combination for anyone.  Especially not a married woman.  

And definitely not a woman married to Legolas Greenleaf.  

But Glrofindel had successfully evaded capture.  Legolas probably had all of Mirkwood looking for them, but they hadn't been found.  And probably wouldn't be.  Mirkwood is, after all, very big.  

"Caladrim?"  a soft voice questioned.  She moved her head to look at Glorfindel.  The disgusting leech.  

"What do you want?  This wasn't part of the plan you know Glorfindel." Caladri scowled at him but all he did was smile.  

"I know it wasn't.  But you know, this wasn't part of the plan either."  And as he said that, he leant down and kissed her softly on the lips.  

And with that, Caladrim did the only thing she could do.  She bit him.  

Hard.  

On the lower lip.  

Maybe not so very practical, but efficient.  Glorfindel leapt up and put a hand on his bleeding lower lip.  When he took it away he saw blood.  Caladrim shivered.  He had a look in his eye that wasn't so very good.  

"Now why, my lady, would you do that to an old friend?" Glorfindel crept closer.  With each step he took, it seemed like the world was getting smaller and smaller.  

"You're not my friend."  Caladrim stated bravely, despite the fact that she was alone, in the woods, with an angry- and possibly insane- elf trying to flirt with her.  

"Oh, I'm not, am I?" Glorfindel smirked.  

Caladrim decided that now would be a good time to distract the elf in front of her and so said "Why did you do this?"  

"Because I love you."  Caladrim began to cough, choke really, and thought '_it's going to be a long, long night if Legolas doesn't find mesoon.'_

But luckily, and just in time really, Legolas and a batch of armed guards burst through the trees.  Seven different arrows were pointed in Glorfindel's direction and so Glorfindel did the only thing he could think of.  

Glrofindel grabbed lady Caladrim and kissed her, again, in front of all these elves, before being launched at by Legolas, and eventually dragged away to Mirkwood castle.  

But Caladrim herself was still tied to the tree.  All the elves but Legolas had left the clearing.  

"Um, Legolas?" He turned to glance at her.  "I was wondering if you could untie me?"  Legolas walked towards and put his face right next to hers.  

"I will, when you tell me why you let Glorfindel kiss you like that."  

Caladrim cursed in her head.  


	11. How to Dig Your Way Out

_Disclaimer: Oh yeah here, she wants you all to know, she DOES NOT OWN LoTR.  _

Revenge Can Be Very Sweet

By: oh yeah

Chapter 11

Caladrim gulped as Legolas approached her.  She was very nervous.  Legolas was never a good person to mess around with, and he was especially bad when he was jealous. 

And jealous he was. 

Caladrim could tell by the way his eye twitched every few seconds and his cheeks were flushed.  If he were human, it would look like he was having a fever.  But as he was an elf, no one dared comment on it. 

Except Caladrim. 

Some may say that this is very brave. Looking back on it, it was really just stupid. 

But, then again, the entire plan was a little stupid.  So she guessed this was just part of the stupidity of the plan.  O, that made her feel SO much better.  But, she guessed it was Elrond's stupidity really, that got her into this mess. 

So she could blame Elrond!  And that she did....

'Now, really honey, calm down.  MY HANDS ARE TIED BEHIND MY BACK!!!  HOW COULD I **_LET_** HIM KISS ME?!?!?!'

This seemed to make no difference to Legolas, as he simply gave her 'the look'.  Now, the part Caladrim hated most about 'the look' was how well and how often, Legolas gave it.  But it seemed like he only did it to her.  Hmm...she should think about this a little when they got home....

After she locked him out of the bedroom for daring to suggest that she would kiss Glorfindel on purpose of course. 

Before Legolas had a chance to say anything, Caladrim did possibly the stupidest thing she had done yet.  'Leggy, honey, you look like a rather ugly human when you get all jealous like that'. 

Time seemed to stand still.  Before, it seemed like maybe Legolas was starting to get over it, but now...he just looked mad.  Very, very mad.  And so Caladrim got very, very scared. 

Legolas' eye was twitching even more.  He seemed to positively shake with anger.  Caladrim closed her eyes and waited for the explosion to happen....until he laughed. 

That's right.  LAUGHED.  What was going on and who had taken her leggy away from her? 

Caladrim just stared.  What the hell….?!?!  What did this mean?  Before, at least she knew what to expect from Legolas.  But now….now she didn't know how to deal with it!!  By the Valar, maybe he was simply acting nice for once…yeah, that's it.  And maybe the dwarves moved above ground.  snorts  Like that's likely to happen. 

God, she made herself laugh. 

And so that's what she did.  She laughed.  She might as well join in with Legolas after all, right?  He was laughing, she'd laugh too!

The moment she started, he stopped. 

Ok, maybe NOT a smart move.  O dear……goodness, she was in trouble this time.  This was worse than when she and her sister Peggy went to visit Elrond without Legolas' 'permission'.  Ha, like she needed that to go anywhere!  She was Caladrim, Princess of Mirkwood, she did not need her husband's permission for anything!

And so she left with Peggy. 

Big mistake. 

The way Legolas came chasing after them, you would have thought he was on fire!!!  Caladrim had never seen an elf run that fast.  Come to think of it, she hoped she didn't again. 

But, back to the present.  Legolas was staring at her like she had grown two heads and started dancing like a dwarf. 

And she danced NOTHING like a dwarf. 

'What happened here?' was all Legolas said.  And so the entire story cam tumbling out.  How Elrond had connived them into doing all of this stuff, and how he was SUCH  mean, bad elf lord and deserved to be punished.  Legolas simply raised an eyebrow. 

But when he heard that Elrond had come up with the plan to be 'kidnapped' by Glorfindel, he did a lot more than raise an eyebrow. 

Legolas jumped up, untied her, put her on his horse, and climbed up after her.  The ride back to the castle, not a word was spoken.  Caladrim wondered how to get herself out of trouble this time. 

The moment they reached home, she went to their bedroom and locked herself in.  Legolas made no move to even TRY to come in.  Instead, near dawn the next morning, he rode off towards Rivendell, in search of a certain Elf Lord…..


End file.
